Canada

Yes, so I'm here... again... It hasn't been that long since I was up north for awhile and, surprisingly, alot has changed here. Last time I was up here was... late July last year?--Yes that's when it was and, for all of you that talked alot to me back then, you'll know that I wasn't in the best of spirits. But not this time, this time has been alot funner so far though there's been alot more to do. Been starting to get things in order for me to move to a feild. I need to see a travel agent sometime soon though, and my home needs to write me back so I can fix a date on my flight.

Yes, in case I didn't tell you, I'm moving from where I live (commonly known as "Texas, bowels of the whore") and going to Europe! Where in Europe I'm not certain of yet but if it all works out it'll be to an FD home in Bosnia. Yey!!

In other news, saw my sister today who i had not seen for almost like 10 years or something. Was really really col seeing her again... Went to this mall in downtown Toronto near the bay and man, this place really really rocked. It wasn't like one of those gross cramped lil things in the states but was like nice and sprawling with fountains and sitting areas and stuff all throughout it. One of them caught my eye in particular: it was this little area with sitting chairs all around a nice little fountian with goldfish in it and trees in the center of it. First rate coffee shop next to it too (Mari their mocha's are divine) and it was just like.... so perfect for writing and harmonious with everything around it and such. I mean gawd! They even had smooth jazz and Don Mclean songs playing faintly in the background, what more to ask for a perfect writing atmosphere?

And then, to top it off the chicks in this mall were first rate too. All rich girls, but not the kind that are snotty and such but just dolled up to near perfection. There was this one girl in particular, little french blonde in a minskirt with her friend. Good, full lips and butt, nice little nose, her eyes were brown and a little bit bland but were well-set and she had perfect posture, which is very rare for a girl of about 16 or 17. What really caught my eye though was her hair: it was about shoulder length, bleached, and set up in a way that it looked like something from an anime cartoon. Good god! I don't think anybody could stop starring.

*sighs*..... Yep......... you gotta love Canada....

Preserverance

Yes those are grapefruits bigger then big Mikes fist..... yes I stacked them all by myself without any help or duct-tape.

Preserverance.... pass it on.

Titles are gay

Well they are... very very gay. I never like titling my posts, even my pieces of writing I hate titling. They usually come up shoddy and weak.

But yes, in other news....................... NECROPHILIA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Haha, that got your attention didn't it? Actually, thats my new word of the week... you'll be surprised at what you can learn when you read a page from a medical dictionary every day.

I haven't forgotton you, I've just been absent. When you read my soon-up-coming piece of poetry/prose you'll understand why. Only got a little bit of it left to finish up and then I'll post it up for everyone to read.

Ta-ta darlings, don't let the baker man scare you.

How to be Persuasive

For all of you who wanted to know how to be persuasive (or just want a laugh) read these. No I did not write them... but their still funny anyways.

Lies
Facts might be the best way to substantiate an argument, but lies are the next best thing. If the facts don't prove your point, make some up. There are varying degrees of lies. A "fib" is a small exaggeration of the truth. A "hyperbole" is a larger exaggeration of the truth. A "lie" is a statement that has nothing whatsoever to do with the truth. A "big lie" is not only blatantly untrue but will cause your great grandmother to roll over in her grave with shame.
The big lie is normally the way to go.

You: "Dogs are better than cats."
Opponent: "I prefer cats."
You: "But cats eat babies! They dig their rabid muzzles into infants' chests and rip their kidneys out!"
Opponent: "No they don't!"
You: "They do! And they killed my great grandmother! Twice!"


Random Comments
The interjection of random comments is a useful diversionary tactic. Although the best way to win an argument is for your opponents to concede the debate to you, this last ditch effort can be used in an emergency to secure a secondary victory by disorienting your opponents so much they don't know how to proceed. This tactic has the side benefit of presenting yourself as knowledgeable on a wide range of subjects, so observers are bound to be impressed by your breadth of expertise.

You: "School lunches suck."
Opponent: "Despite the taste, school lunches are, in actuality, very nutritional."
You: "On the contrary! Mahogany is one of Honduras' primary lumber exports."
Opponent: "Mahogany? Honduras? This has nothing to do with school lunches!"
You: "Yeah, well, I could beat you at arm wrestling!"
Opponent: "What does-- But-- You--"


Name Calling
Name calling is an efficient way of pointing out your opponents' weaknesses and call into question the authority with which they dispute your position. By encouraging your opponents to doubt their competence, you can undermine a contrary argument from the inside. For example:

You: "I believe all short people should be beaten with rocks until they bleed."
Opponent: "I think that's a very horrible and malicious idea."
You: "Well, you're fat! Fatty fat doo doo head!"
Opponent: (sobs)


Flailing Arms
The flailing arms strategy is used to express surprise and to reinforce your arguments. It's very hard to disagree with someone who waves his arms in confidence. For example:

Opponent: "Water is very important. You need to drink it to survive."
You: (waving arms wildly) "Water is poisonous!"
Opponent: "Whatever you say man, just please, don't hurt me!"


Biting
Biting is a last ditch effort. You use this tactic when the other person has been given every opportunity to conform to your opinion and still refuses. It is normally best to go for an important artery or organ. The jugular vein is recommended, as it is located roughly at mouth height.

You: "I'm right."
Opponent: "I don't agree. In my opinion, yo--"

And yeah, thats about it... funny though no?

I'm BAAACCCK!!!!

Well only for awhile, in a few hours I need to be going out on the road till monday so then i'll be really back but thats beside the point.

Miss me?!? If you didn't then a pox on you too!!

Just wanted the world to know that I'm still here and yes (to quell rumors) still breathing with full brain functions as well. Though, naturally, the bain function parts is highly debatable. Haha!

Anyways, got backa few hours from the MATCH Meeting. (A four day camp for all of Texas) the people from New Orleans and Jopland came as well so yea it was pretty cool. Lots of girls, lots of old friends... sick as a dog but I got a smile on my face:D

Pray that this weekend goes well though, got three looong days of ballons to look foward to and I'm feeling feverish. *shudders*