Another One

There's something about this piece that I don't like... I'm not certain really, but I do know that I like the last stanza and the fourth and fifth lines on the second. Just a little scribbling to get the creative juices back and flowing.


Sleepwalker

By moonlight in the rainy night
Slick contours of shivering black
Wrapped their shadow fingers round
My frozen, iron toes; stumbling
Along empty, eerie, passageways.

Oh my stomach!—stick with me now;
Do not desert me as my mind!
The coward, the coward! Run he has
Along the way to hunt down dreams
That trapeze off the precipice.

I dance, I dance!—sleepy Rumba
Music drapes the lining of my bed
With its gossamer, milky flames;
I hear loud tapping—is it drums,
Is it the knocking of my knees?

As I drift down the swirling barge
Upon the river of my sleep;
I do not know, yet stay yourself
And watch as I dissect tigers
For the ancient Indus Queen.

Dear Mr. Antagonist

Recently I came across an letter/what-have-you written by an ex-member about the Offensive. Seems that x's have it in their heads that the Offensive is going to be a grand money-gathering scheme by the upper level of WS which will then climax in a worldwide mass suicide of all family members. WS will then go off to live in grand mansions in someplace exotic and live happily ever after.

Honestly now, dear Mr, Antagonist, how stupid do you think we are? Do you really think that anyone in their right minds would go along with that sort of thing? To be honest, you disgust me with your blatant stupidity! You go on sites called "Moving On" and continually whine about your life in The Family. Think about it, if you ever wanted to "move on" from something isn't trying not to think about it the first step to doing so? Aren't your whiny drivels a little counterproductive?

Don't get me wrong, I have many friends/family that have left the Family and I still keep in good contact with them. I still love them and I respect their decisions. What bothers me though is when some people leave and come up with grandiose stories about how they had to eat rat brains the size of locomotives in the combo homes, or say that I am brainwashed and throwing my life away because I do not believe what they have become "enlightened" to.

So what if I never make alot of money? I got a job that I love and I go to bed each night happy because I know that I did something good for humanity today. When was the last time you did something nice for a complete stranger, for no reason at all except that you loved him? He's a person just like you are. He's got a life, and friends, and worries, and fears too. When was the last time you did something nice for him just because of that: out of respect and love for his humanity? Until you have don't try to tell me that I'm not following the Bible or that I'm not a disciple of Jesus. I really don't care when you say "You'd never make it out in the system" because I don't want to and its o.k because you'd never make it in the Family. So therefore go on and live your life and move on with it. Stop trying to make me think that mine isn't that great because your not the one living it so how can you judge me, really? I'm the bride of Christ, a hardcore disciple of the Teaching. So fuck the system and fuck the world and all its ways. I got my Jesus and that is all that I really need to be happy.

Feminine or Masculine?

To be honest, I've always preferred feminine rhymes over masculine. Their so much more delightful to chew on, and plus I've always liked to use them as a good pivot for turn-of-phrase. They do take some time to get the hang of though... whats miserable if you have quatrain after quatrain of them with no end in sight. It might be good if your doing heavy-handed metaphysical conceits. But otherwise I think they should be used very sparingly. Like salt in cooking... less is more for most dishes if used properly.

Something I do like doing though is making a two-syllable feminine on the first or third line and making the following rhyme in the sequence a two-word, monosyllable, masculine. (Provided its ABAB our following.)

Just a rough example, but something like this:

Jesus, (first or second line)
Please us. (third or fourth line)

Granted, I would never use those in an actual verse, but you get what I'm saying, no? Also, something thats fun is using the above example as an internal rhyme. But that only works if you use one or two monosyllables directly between the first and second rhyme in sequence. I.E: Jesus, you please us. If not you only have the rhyme strung too close on itself and its more of a liability to the overall quality of the sound than anything. The same goes for alliteration... but that could be a whole 'nother post in itself.

Anyway, what are your thoughts on it?

A Thought to Consider

"It’s the freedom of spirit, the difference in spirit that makes heads turn. People won’t necessarily remember you for the clothes that you wear, the hairstyle that you have, or the jewelry or trinkets you sport, but they’ll always remember your spirit. They’ll always remember the love you gave, the freedom you possessed, the cool treasures of the spirit that were a living part of you. Those are the things that count. Those are the things that make a difference. Those are the things that make you stand out in the crowd."

Amen?

HAPPY CANADA DAY

Well... what of it?? I'm Canadian so there!! *sticks tongue out*

I was going to go and see the fireworks but I stayed back so another one of the teens could go. I love the fireworks that they have though... their one of my most favorite things.

I was going to put up pictures of the fireworks, but they wouldn't upload... so lets just watch this video and it be enough, yes?? Ignore the pictures.... just listen to the thing...